notes: And Yet

100% of proceeds from this album will be donated to Lambda Legal to defend the rights of transgender people in the US.

(If you would like to donate directly to the cause, I can also recommend ACLU (American Civil Liberties Union), The Transgender Law Center or A4TE (Advocates For Trans Equality). I don’t recommend HRC (Human Rights Campaign) due to a consistently poor record on trans issues, very high executive pay, and several other problems.

  • This fight is personal. I’m nonbinary, a teen member of my extended family is also nonbinary, and an immediate family member is transgender.
  • In the electronic music industry, there are and have been many trans and nonbinary instrument designers and musicians, including crucial pioneers such as Wendy Carlos and Émilie Gillet.
  • This is not “radical gender ideology”, nor a mere Gen Z trend. There has never been a time in human history without trans, nonbinary, and gender nonconforming people. The oldest written words (from Mesopotamia) and the archeological evidence prove it.

As I began to record this album, my emotional state was shifting from initial dismay at the barrage of executive orders to defiance, rejection of hatred, and a joyful pride in who I am. Most of all, a love for those who came before and fought for human rights, made art that enriched our lives, and were unapologetically themselves.

No “AI” tools were used in the creation of the music, the cover image, or any of this text. All tracks were improvised. Any sequencing was done with free-running minimalist loop sequencers. The recordings were full mixes with effects baked in, not individual stems, and sometimes minor additional layers were dubbed in afterward.

Hardware is in bold and software is in italics. Basic utilities, dynamics/EQ processing, and some simple modulation sources are usually omitted from the descriptions.

For controllers I use MN 0-Ctrl, Roger Linn Linnstrument 128, Tesseract Sweet Sixteen mk2, three Nektar expression pedals with a MIDI Expression Quatro, Intellijel Planar 2, and Bela Gliss.

For mastering: Wavesfactory Spectre, Toneboosters Equalizer Pro, Waves Curve Equator, DDMF MagicDeathEye, RJ Studios SideMinder Max, Voxengo Elephant & OVC-128 with metering from Voxengo Span Plus & Correlometer and YuLean Loudness Meter.

BW = Bitwig
IME = Industrial Music Electronics
MI = Mutable Instruments
MN = Make Noise
NE = Noise Engineering
NI = Native Instruments
UA = Unfiltered Audio
WR = Whimsical Raps

01 Raw and Wriggling

  1. Dawsome Myth, BW Grid [6 Vowel filters output to the modular], WR Silhouette, MI Beads, Plogue Chipcrusher, Valhalla Plate. Silhouette Focus modulation from NE Clep Diaz.
  2. WR Just Friends, Xaoc Tallin, MN QPAS, Audiority Velvet Machine. QPAS Modulation from NE Clep Diaz & MI Stages.
  3. IME Kermit mk2, u-he Uhbik-G, Sinevibes Droplet
  4. ALM Akemie’s Castle, Atovproject cDVCA, Valhalla Supermassive. Controlled by Intellijel Planar.
  5. Sample from a Kawasaki toy keyboard, processed multiple times with Audiority Velvet Machine.

02 I’m Still Here

  1. Auza Wave Packets, Rabid Elephant Natural Gate, NE Librae Legio, MN Mimoephon, Aberrant DSP Lair, Audiority Electric Matter. Sequence from MN 0-Ctrl, waveshape modulation from WR Just Friends.
  2. IME Kermit with both oscillators droning and AMing each other, Phonolyth Cascade
  3. NE Toros Iteritas Alia, MN QPAS with level ducked by voice 1. Same Lair/Electric Matter chain as 1. Modulation of Toros and QPAS from Just Friends.
  4. Kermit’s outputs into MN Stages in synced LFO mode (for frequency division, glitches and reshaping). Audiority Velvet Machine, Valhalla Supermassive.
  5. Neutral Labs Elmyra 2, Valhalla Plate, FabFilter Saturn 2.
  6. Arturia CZ V (sub drone).

03 The Beginning is Always the Hardest

  1. looped recording of VCV Rack [2x Alias VCO into 2D Rotation, CF100 filter, Plateau, LFOs]
  2. Madrona Labs Aalto, two instances of Kilohearts Filter Table in series, Valhalla Delay. (played on Linnstrument)
  3. Xaoc Odessa, NE Fala Versio, NE Lacrima Versio, Ujam UFX-Reverb. Modulation from Auza Wave Packets & MI Stages, simple sequence from MN 0-Ctrl.
  4. MN Spectraphon (SAO mode), Djupviks Bunker Archeology, Wildergarden MAIM, Sinevibes Integer (drone)

Additional processing at end: my own experimental Charlie Bucket distortion and Crumble resampling VST plugins.

04 Contra Vermes

  1. Xaoc Katowice feeding back into itself, with frequency and width modulated by two audio-rate sines from MN Spectraphon. Toneboosters Equalizer Pro clamped down on the buzzy high frequencies.
  2. Arturia Augmented Voices, Moogerfooger MF-103S phaser.
  3. NE Ataraxic Iteritas, MN QPAS, MN Mimeophon, BW Grid [Sallen-Key lowpass and bandpass in parallel, panning the bandpass modulated by a synced envelope], Valhalla Delay. Sequence is from MI Marbles modulated by MN 0-Ctrl, clocked by Bitwig. Mimoephon delay time and Ataraxic waveshape modulated by MI Stages LFOs.
  4. at the end, voice #3 was layered in without the sequence, with QPAS’ Q and Mimeophon’s Mix and Halo increased.

05 Snakes and Spice

  1. MN Strega through Arturia Minibrute 2S, Cytomic The Scream, UA Lo-fi-AF, NI Raum
  2. NE Ataraxic Iteritas through Atovproject cDVCA into WR Silhouette (along with IME Kermit and “Shadow” feedback), Sonic Charge Echobode. Pulse driven by MN Function.
  3. ALM Akemie’s Castle, MN QPAS, MI Beads, my own Horse experimental chorus plugin, Sinevibes Integer (two instances in series). QPAS level and freq modulated by a level-triggered envelope from voice 1.
  4. MN Mimeophon oscillating, NE Fala Versio, PSP Pianoverb 2, Newfangled Audio Obliterate chained into Inphonik PCM 2612, Valhalla Delay, u-he Twangstrom

06 Hobgoblinery

  1. MN Spectraphon through Atovproject cDVCA and Rabid Elephant Natural Gate, WR Silhouette (with Shadow feedback through Instruo DAPF), MN Mimeophon, Arturia Rev Plate-140. LFOs from MI Stages and NE Clep Diaz modulated many things.
  2. Neutral Labs Elmyra 2, Aberrant DSP Lair, Audio Damage Ratshack Reverb.
  3. Xaoc Odessa, MN QPAS, NE Lacrima Versio, Freakshow Industries Dreameater, JMG Retronaut, NE Desmodus
  4. Dawesome Myth, NI Raum.

07 Hej Blåhaj

Pre-recorded drone loop: NE Toros Iteritas Alia, NE Ataraxic Iteritas & MN Spectraphon feeding WR Silhouette (with Shadow feedback), NE Imitor, UA Sandman, Audiothing Lines, Audiority Ripple Phaser, Moogfooger MF-101S filter, Aegean Pitchproof.

  1. Drone loop processed by MN Spectraphon
  2. Sutble noise: WR Silhouette with Light feedback through Instruo DAPF; pitched down and limited in Sound Forge Pro.
  3. Drone loop processed by BW Harmonic Split (removing fundamental & every 3rd harmonic), BW Pitch Shifter, Audiority Velvet Machine
  4. Drone loop processed by BW Lowpass MG filter.
  5. RYK Algo, Xaoc Tallin, MN Mimeophon, Instruo DAPF, Sonic Charge Echobode, Arturia Refract, Valhalla Delay. Sequence from MN 0-Ctrl & pitch transpose from Intellijel Planar button
  6. Xaoc Odessa, Atovproject cDVCA, Sinevibes Integer, Izotope RX7 De-click outputting clicks only through Impact Soundworks Gameverb, Melda MAGC (to clamp down on feedback from delays when input signal is quiet). Modulation from IME Zorlon Cannon mk2, and pitch mod from Bela Gliss pressure
  7. VCV Rack [Noise Plethora, 2x Instruo I-047], RX7 Declick outputting clicks only, Phonolyth Velvet Machine

08 Fraud Department

  1. Xaoc Odessa, MI Blades, Rabid Elephant Natural Gate, MI Beads, NI Supercharger GT, Kilohearts Filter Table, Arturia Rev Plate-140. NG controlled by WR Silhouette Right output (see below).
  2. Both outputs of ALM Akemie’s Castle into Doepfer A-150-1 switch ch1, and also through MN Mimeophon into switch channel 2. MN Function LFO controls FM amount and clocks MN 0-Ctrl. 0-Ctrl sequences Castle’s pitches as well as the rate of an MI Stages LFO which modulates WR Silhouette. Sil’s Light and Left inputs control the two Doepfer switches.
  3. NE Toros Iteritas Alia and IME Kermit mk2, MN QPAS, TB Equalizer Pro (modulated by LFOs), Aberrant DSP Lair. QPAS and Kermit modulated by WR Just Friends, which is FMd by the slow LFO from MN Function.
  4. Xaoc Odessa, MI Rings, NE Fala Versio, d16 Fazortan 2, Valhalla Delay. Modulation from Auza Wave Packets.
  5. Arturia Minibrute 2S through MN Strega, VCV Rack [2x Cytomic CF100 filters]

09 Spinnt

Almost everything is driven by a master LFO in Bitwig Grid, with several variations using Phase modules, clock dividers, latches etc. modulating and gating many different things in the hardware.

  1. MI Rings into MN Multimod; outputs 1 & 8 through Doepfer A150-1 switch, MN QPAS, MI Beads, VCV Rack [Sckitam 2D Rotation], Valhalla Delay
  2. ouputs 2-7 of Multimod into WR Silhouette, MN Mimeophon.
  3. IME Zorlon Cannon mk2, Atovproject cDVCA, BW Delay+, UA SpecOps, NE Imitor
  4. WR Just Friends, NE Lacrima Versio, BW Grid [Lowpass MG and Rasp filters in parallel, modulated by envelope follower monitoring Zorlon, with a delay on the CV of Rasp], Audiority Doomagorgon, Audiority Tube Modulator, NE Librae
  5. MN Strega, VCV Rack [Sinensis], MI Stages (with feedback loop) as lo-fi delay, BW Chorus+, Valhalla Plate. Played on Linnstrument via NE Univer Inter. Sound Forge amplitude modulation applied 3x at different rates during post-processing.
  6. Karyofer bass tagelharpa sample, timestretched.

10 The Rainbow is the Gold

  1. RYK Algo, u-he Twangstrom, Moog MF-103S Phaser, 2x Kilohearts Filter Table (mid/side). Level/FM controlled by Intellijel Planar.
  2. NE Toros Iteritas Alia, Rabid Elephant Natural Gate, Instruo DAPF, MN QPAS, Audiority Velvet Machine, BW Sweep. DAPF modulation from MN Multimod.
  3. IME Zorlon Cannon mk2 & WR Just Friends, BW Grid patch [8x VCAs controlled by MN Multimod, converted from CV to MIDI CC by Tesseract Sweet Sixteen], VCV Rack [2D Rotation], JMG Retronaut, Inertia Sound Systems Hinder. A simple LFO from MI Stages feeds Multimod’s input, as well as a BW Grid patch that derives four gates which modulate Multimod’s phase, the level of the Index output signal which modulates Zorlon’s pitch, and Just Friends’ Intone.
  4. VCV Rack [Noise Plethora modulated by 4 LFOs], 2 instances of Valhalla Delay in series.

    End processed in Sound Forge with pitch bend, distortion, and amplitude modulation.