assorted mixed nuts

J.K. Rowling, you bigoted, lying, smug sack of moldering dog shit, I hope you choke on your stupid fucking cigar, and may everything you eat and drink taste like ashes for the rest of your miserable life. You had the rare chance to bring joy to a lot of people as an author… and then you turned your life to bigotry and the denial of other peoples’ dignity. Does it make you happy to know that you have caused suffering, that you have increased the suicide rate of teens and young adults? That you’re now congratulating yourself on helping to have oppressed one of the most vulnerable minorities? You are, frankly, more of a one-dimensional villain than the ones you wrote; your motive makes zero sense, will not enrich you or enhance your reputation in any way, and seems to be simply evil for the sake of evil. You could have gone down in history as “beloved author of fantasy novels for children and young adults” but you instead chose “weirdly bigoted scumbag who condemned herself to irrelevance.”


Now that that’s out of my system…

A couple of things that are in my system now are Nudistort, a weird distortion-plus plugin that one really has to try for oneself to properly appreciate it, and Circa, a 6-layer looper plugin from Audio Damage.

Nudistort came out some time ago and I didn’t try it then. I just sort of dismissed it as “okay, it’s an extreme distortion that makes stuff sound weird, what else is new?” Many such plugins just don’t do it for me. But it got a mention over on Lines, and I took it for a spin — just playing plain sines with MPE pressure using Aalto — and oh wow, it’s fun stuff. Honestly now I wish I’d tried this first, I’d have skipped over Dawesome Hate.

Circa is not AD’s first looper. Enso leaned much more into tape emulation, which sounded great, but many people (including me) found it awkward and frustrating to work with, so it just sat unused. Circa has introduced some improvements, though a few aspects of the workflow are still a little unintuitive. It’s also designed more for freeform experimentation, in other words, my kind of thing.

It has a bit of anti-click going on but it’s far from perfect, especially (it seems) when you start using multiple layers that aren’t 100% synced to each other. Sometimes instead of clicks you get… let’s call them “fuzzy sound floofs” which are far more difficult to clean up. And though it’s meant to sound like a (semi-?)modern digital looper, the artifacts from slowing the replay speed aren’t as pleasant as on something like Jroo Loop or Phonogene. Still, I can work with its limitations, and just in a few short hours of demoing it I’ve had fun and made three different things I want to use in my music.

Previously, Audio Damage was one of the rare plugin developers that did not offer free demos. Instead, they had a no-questions-asked return policy. It was a hassle for everyone involved, as far as I’m concerned, and always made me reluctant. At this point I would absolutely not have bought Circa just to try it, so I’m glad they finally changed positions on this. Demos sell plugins.


I’ve just read Life Isn’t Binary, which as it turns out is less specifically about nonbinary gender and more about social binaries in general. In fact it begins with sexuality, and the erasure of bisexuality, asexuality and other things that… I’m not 100% convinced are really “sexual” as such but not entirely unrelated. Gender is next (considering not just male/female but cis/trans and even binary/nonbinary); relationships, bodies, mental health, conflicts and thinking itself are also covered.

Basically every social binary has emerged from there being a privileged group and a “lesser” group, or an “us” and a “them” or “normal” and “abnormal.” A sort of caste system if you will, where to question the binary is to question privilege, and to be outside that binary is to make one’s life inherently political (like it or not).

all in all

Here’s a progress photo of the lower wall, from Wednesday afternoon:

Construction was finished on Friday afternoon. Sunday, we put in some edge bricks along the top to divide where the wildflowers and grass are going to go; Monday the wall company sent someone to put back our stepping stones on the top tier, spread a straw mulch/grass seed mix where there’s supposed to be grass, and collect the check.

Here it is as of Monday afternoon:

A couple of neighborhood folks have complimented how good it looks. Really, almost anything would have been an improvement over the crumbling walls and rampant weeds and honeysuckle we had before. But it’ll be much nicer once the grass and plants grow in!

We weren’t entirely sure what that protruding pipe thing is next to the sidewalk, but a little internet sleuthing tells me it’s probably a water shutoff valve. Once upon a time, there was a bit of gravel between the sidewalk and old wall so it didn’t stick out so much. Now there’s no lid on the top and it’s kind of full of dirt, but apparently this isn’t a real problem. I’m more worried about someone tripping over it, or parking on it if they get a bit overzealous with the sidewalk parking, particularly in the snow. So maybe we can protect it a bit or flag it/make it more visible.


I had to remind myself again: Trump = brain poison. I have backed out of some threads I was reading on a couple of forums, and I’m happier. But Musk really seems to be circling the drain, so memes mocking him, the Swasticar, Tesla stock prices etc. are pretty funny.


Superbooth 2025 is… wait, it’s still almost a month away? You wouldn’t necessarily know that from following Eurorack forums where the anticipation and pre-event release announcements have already begun. I hope to be able to blissfully ignore them and make no more changes to my rig. So far so good.

Every once in a while on synth forums you’ll see someone say “I’ve been out of the scene for 5 years, catch me up!” There is a new one of those today, and I had to laugh.

We’re talking 6500 or more new Eurorack modules on the market since then; if one assumes that only 1% of them are interesting, that’s still a lot to look into. Some modules will take a lot of research to begin to understand (and really, some things can’t even properly be appreciated until you use them). Some big players in the market have closed for business, and some new lines/platforms have been introduced. Among my favorites, Make Noise and Noise Engineering have been especially busy.

As of right now, about half my modules are < 5 years old (in terms of release date, not purchase date). Out of my own curiosity, here’s the number of modules I have sold (or traded for something else) per year. All of these have been replaced by a “new to me” module (not necessarily newly developed or newly built).

(A bit of what I credited to 2018 might have been 2017; my records were unclear. 2019 was the year I consolidated to one case, sold a lot of stuff off to get an ER-301 and then reversed course. Some of what I sold in 2024 was holdovers that I set aside from 2023, and in 2025 4 of those 5 were holdovers from 2024. But you see the trend toward more stability.)

The “E” album — whatever I end up naming it — is now at 6 tracks, 35 minutes. Moving along.


I may end up creating a separate page just to track my mini-reviews of shaving/skin stuff, as well as one for flavored coffees… and maybe kitty litter if I have to keep shopping around. For now:

  • Southern Witchcrafts Autumn Ash smells exactly like roasting greasy sausages over a campfire… in a Michael’s with Halloween approaching. The main thing that’s spooky about it is how precisely it smells like that. It is not for me.
  • Southern Witchcrafts Lycanthropy has a strong jasmine scent, but with a bit of complexity lurking, reminding me a little of a random cologne I got as a gift in my late teens or early 20s… which may not even be a real memory. Anyway, it’s pretty pleasant and I’d gladly get more of it.
  • I am trying Geo. F. Trumper’s Coral Skin Food for post-shave. There are lime and sandalwood varieties, but those didn’t receive the kinds of rave reviews this one did. It’s got a very strong rose scene, not my favorite floral but not too bad given how little of it you’re supposed to use. I’ll keep it up, but it may be redundant with my favorite nighttime moisturizer (Cetaphil Redness Relieving).

One thing about my updated routine is that the skin of my face, particularly around the chin that was so used to having a goatee for so long, tends to feel warm. Not literally warm to the touch, but internally, if that makes sense. This doesn’t seem to be related to what products I am using, how aggressively smoothly I try to shave, time of day etc. — I think it’s not skin irritation, but an odd sensory thing, I’m just surprised I haven’t gotten used to it yet.

(On coffee? Cameron’s Highlander Grog, and New England Coffee’s Witch’s Potion, Coconut Almond Candy Bar, and Chocolate Hazelnut are the favorites so far. I have three new ones waiting to try once I’ve used my current stash of the Potion though.)

(And on litter? So far my vote goes to Pidan Tofu & Recycled Coffee Grounds. It also contains a small amount of bentonite clay, which helps it to clump and fills in gaps between the small noodle-shaped pellets. I like it because it tracks VERY little compared to everything else we have tried, has practically no dust and seems competent at odor control. It’s pricey, and like most tofu-based litter it’s from China, which means it may be even more pricey next time I have to order some. Possibly still worth it, not to feel like we’re sleeping on gravel — Tidy Cats Clean Paws is supposed to be low-tracking but in our experience was the absolute worst.)

now you’re NOT cooking with gas

Some excitement yesterday as the construction crew hit our gas line.

The first I was aware of it was when firefighters knocked on the door to ask to check our basement. (It was okay.) This was a little bit after 4 PM.

Then Spire, the gas company, came. They bashed the sidewalk open with an excavator, then had to also tear a hole in the street.

Apparently the markings for the gas line had been wrong — the contractor said they’re supposed to go up the hill like they did with the water line. Since the markings for the gas main were on the sidewalk rather than the street where they made the connection, I suspect that might also have been incorrect. Perhaps there was an old inactive line. (He said in 26 years of business, this is the 5th time they’ve hit a gas line, and every time it was due to incorrect markings.)

The gas company has been upgrading everyones’ copper lines (which were only supposed to last 20 years!) to PE, but the wall contractor said they had something like 600,000 homes to do so it had been taking several years. So they took the opportunity to replace ours.

The sun set. They barely had any light to work with, a couple of headlamps and flashlights, but they kept going. I wound up going upstairs to read myself to sleep, but started hearing weird noises coming through the AC vents. Then the heater kicked in and I figured we’d gotten the OK to turn the furnace back on. Then there was a lot of clanging and banging and bright lights at the front (our bedroom windows are on the back of the house) as they started piling stuff back into the holes they’d dug, and covered over the big hole in the street with a metal plate.

Here’s the view this morning. Not shown: a UCIS pickup truck off to the right, presumably trying to figure out how they went wrong with the markings, or perhaps marking the location of the new line as if it isn’t really obvious now.

I really dislike those street plates. I know they’re great for a quick fix but they wind up sitting there for ages before being properly patched. But then, St. Louis county increasingly seems to be behind on road maintenance and has some really low-quality patch jobs on some major roads. There’s one section of Page that was freshly paved only a couple of years ago, but it has long stripes of deep potholes running uninterrupted through the entire length. So our street, which probably should have been resurfaced about 5 years ago, is probably going to have that stupid plate for quite a while.

One of the weird things about this is, nobody from the gas company came to talk to us until they were done. The only information I got was from the firefighters, and from the contractor when I went outside to look around and ask about stuff while the gas company was getting ready to tear up the sidewalk.

dig it

Day one of wall rebuilding happened while I was at work. Some construction begins with demolition:

Last Friday when they parked their equipment in our driveway, our neighbor came over to ask if she could buy the stones from the old wall to use in her garden. I said “just take them, they were going to throw them away anyhow.” She’s older than we are, but clearly in good shape; those blocks are not light by any means, but she wound up taking most of them, building a short temporary wall the length of her driveway until she’s ready to bring them to her backyard. I feel like the wall company should be paying her for the labor!

There’s a frenzy of activity out there this morning, a Bobcat with a scoop on an arm (I’m not sure what these things are called) and a car-sized earth mover, a trailer of more equipment/supplies, a flatbed truck with the blocks. I suspect by the end of the day it’s going to start looking like walls again.


And speaking of demolition:

At the company lunch today, the boss and the other senior engineer were talking about it and literally said “if you want to make an omelette, you have to break a few eggs” and then went on to talk about other things. As if there was any sanity in these stupid tariffs, and as if the thing that’s actually been wrong with the US economy income inequality) could be fixed in this way. My guess is, they’re just watching Faux News because they’re conservatives, and they’re not getting the story of how the tariff policy was created using ChatGPT 3 hours before it was announced and is utter nonsense. These two are very smart engineers (and one’s also a mathematician) with doctorates, who are immigrants from two different authoritarian regimes. One of them always talks about how little he trusts “the government” in general… but he’s swallowing the bullshit they’re feeding him.

Trump isn’t making an omelette, he’s just stomping on eggs.


I’ve recorded another couple of tracks, sticking to my “game” rules. I had doubts about both of them during the process. Particularly with the bass tracks, there is more “assembly” than live playing, and as I record I don’t have a solid feel for what the results are going to be. But the results have actually been decent. I’ll continue, but after this I want the next project to be a free-for-all without any rules, because it’s simply more fun and inspiring.


I’ve resigned myself to shaving…

  • 8 weeks of IPL have not reduced hair growth on my face and neck at all — I am guessing because my hair is too blonde (despite what the beard looked like). I’m not completely sure it hasn’t caused some irritation., so I’m going to stop using the device.
  • Laser might work better depending on wavelength, but a full course of treatment is expensive and only lasts about a year.
  • Electrolysis is more of a sure thing. But given the amount of time to treat a beard, it would end up costing thousands.
  • Epilation, for beards, seems to be only for the brave/foolhardy. Beard hair is coarse and the risk of ingrown hairs is apparently relatively high.
  • Waxing, for beards, seems generally less warned against than epilation. But some say don’t do it at all; others say the first session is really painful; others say it’s just not that effective. A lot of professionals either won’t do it, or just don’t have much experience with it. Given my sensitive skin it seems like a bad idea.

And no, going back to having a goatee or mustache or any of it isn’t happening. I like having a smooth face, for the hours when it stays smooth at least.

So yeah, shaving it is. If I have to do it, I might as well make the most of it and have at least a little fun with it, if that’s the right word. Southern Witchcrafts Druantia is a nice shave soap, with cedar, sandalwood and citrusy notes; I prefer it to the Valley of Ashes formula. (Even though Druantia was basically invented by Robert Graves, who was a poet rather than a historian or anthropologist…) After testing with the LESSN bar again, I think this stuff does work about equally well; the disappointment I had in shave closeness and skin feel the next day was more likely due to needing to change my razor cartridge instead. (I used to be really lax about that, when I kept the goatee. Gotta be more proactive.) I’d originally been planning to go through the SW samples one at a time first and then use the Midnight Dreary, but I think I’m just going to try them all and maybe order some others and just indulge my curiosity.

FDT

Trump is a poor person’s idea of a rich man, a weak person’s idea of a strong man, and a stupid person’s idea of a smart man.

I’m not sure who said that first. One site credits Michael Moore, but I don’t know. Anyway. This.

Trump is completely out of touch, living in his rich asshole bubble the way he does — and his dementia (or maybe drug-addled stupor, or both) is increasingly on display.

An old fashioned term that we use — groceries. I used it on the campaign. It’s such an old fashioned term, but a beautiful term. Groceries. It says a bag with different things in it.


I think Robert Reich has this nailed: 10 rules for dealing with Trump’s demands for capitulation

Trump is 100% in this for his own ego. He doesn’t care about trade deficits, about fentanyl, about protecting women or children, about the price of eggs, about the middle class, about farmers, about the rest of the world’s goodwill toward America, or anything else. I suspect he doesn’t even actually care about his various bigotries, he’s just echoing the hate that his cult wants to hear. Trump cares only about making Trump feel important.

He is cosplaying as a head of state, just as he previously pretended to be a shrewd businessman (when the reality is, if he’d parked his inherited wealth in a money market account and started zero businesses, he’d be richer today).

The difference from his first administration is, other scumbags have latched onto him, knowing he’s weak-minded and gullible and doesn’t give a shit; they are playing him, using him as their puppet. Not just Putin this time, but Musk, Zuck, the Project 2025 shitheads, etc. The main dangers in that game are (A) that Trump has no loyalty to anyone but Trump, (B) many of the would-be puppet masters hate each other’s guts, (C) Trump’s increasingly blatant dementia and absolute foolhardiness and that of his cabinet and followers may outpace or overshadow them achieving their goals, and (D) wrecking necessary governmental institutions and crashing the economy doesn’t help the billionaires. As Musk sees with Tesla stock plunging, sales falling off, dealerships being vandalized etc. The leopards are eating everyones’ faces here.

Also this:

It is very likely that the tariff policy was generated by ChatGPT. And it includes tariffs against islands that are inhabited only by penguins, and against the British India Ocean Territory, which is occupied only by a joint US/UK military base (the original population having been forcibly deported to other islands by the UK in 1968-1973). Of course, the stupidity of those details pales in comparison to the economic and diplomatic stupidity of the tariffs in the first place.

And then there’s Elon, whose DOGE has basically been nothing but piracy:
Elon Musk Can’t Take the Heat
Everything is blowing up in Elon Musk’s face
‘Constant failure’

Five months ago, The Economist (not known to be particularly leftist…) said on a magazine cover that America’s economy (under Biden) was “the envy of the world.” Today:

Oddly, I am hopeful that billionaires and would-be billionaires, and all those people who put on blinders to Trump’s idiocies up to this point, will collectively admit the so-called emperor has no clothes, withdraw their support, pressure other Republicans to resist Trump’s worst excesses, discredit the entire MAGA / Project 2025 program, and walk back on all of the hateful bullshit. The cognitive dissonance can only stretch so far. Right?

Right…?


Anyway, enough of that.

I started reading Jonathan Stearne’s The Audible Past yesterday. Though it’s the kind of intellectual thing that could have been very dry, the writing style prevents it from being too much so and it’s telling an intriguing story. For instance: Alexander Graham Bell, before the telephone, wanted to make devices to “help” deaf people — by which he meant, train them to pass as hearing in mainstream society. (He was a eugenics fan and opposed to deaf folks having their own language and culture.) He and Clarence J Blake invented the “ear phonotograph,” which used an actual human middle ear sourced from a dead guy (unlike the earlier phonotograph) to transcribe sound waves onto paper.

But the same day I started reading this book, we had a thunderstorm and a very close lightning strike took out my computer speakers. There was a super bright flash from the lightning and basically instantaneous thunder, and I’m pretty sure I did hear a “pop” from the speakers. They were cheap, a barebones older generation of Creative Pebble speakers, not really used for music production. Still, it irked me to have to untangle their cables, toss it away and buy another pair. This time I’m going for a slight upgrade, Creative T100, still very much computer speakers and nothing super hi-fi though. The acoustics and noise in this room aren’t worth spending more, and I feel like my music is headphones-oriented anyway.


The shaving soap and brush arrived. I mostly like the scents as they sit in their containers. I’ve used Southern Witchcrafts’ “Valley of Ashes” twice so far, once without and once without the “Smolder” pre-shave oil.

The description of the scent notes of that one is odd: “Coal, Tar, Bourbon, Tobacco, Bitter Citrus, Smoke, Leather, Motor Oil, Burning Rubber, Diesel, Clove, Birch Tar, Bergamot.” Some folks online say it smells like an old-fashioned but well-kept auto repair shop, or “like Alfred working on the Batmobile” or other such things. I’m really not getting the hydrocarbon thing from it at all, nor big masculine energy; especially with the pre-shave oil I’m getting more of an impression of frankincense maybe. To me it’s slightly unusual but pleasant, and does smell like something one should be shaving with.

This is my first time using a shaving brush, and this soap does lather up very quickly and is smooth, but “thin” rather than “bulky” the way the LESSN bar can be. As I shave I don’t end up with clogs of semi-solid gunk on the razor that needs to be re-melted and rinsed off with hot water. I would say it’s not as moisturizing, and my face doesn’t seem as smooth the next day. After two shaves there’s still enough in the sample container for one or maybe even two more rounds, and I’ll go ahead and finish it before trying the next thing. (Actually I’m also curious how LESSN works with the brush instead of directly rubbing it on.)


The wall contractor’s going to park some equipment in our driveway today, so that’s a sign of impending progress — hopefully the work will start on Monday, which is forecast to be dry and cool again after this stormy week.